Tuesday, June 16, 2009

I am so doomed.

I am a hypochondriac.

I always have been, always will. I fully admit to this. My head hurts, I have a brain tumor. My jaw hurts, I have a root canal. I get a little light headed, I'm having a stage five million heart attack. Yeeeeah. Compound this with the fact that I tend to worry over anything worry-able that presents itself to me and I should be the poster gal for Paxil. (But I'm not on anything! My nerves are all natural, baby.)

So I've been having these small chest pains today. Only two or three sporadic times, but the first time it happened at work, I was convinced I was going into cardiac arrest. (Even though I had an EKG a year ago and it came back a-ok.) I sit at my desk, staring wide-eyed at my tea mug, wondering if my co-workers would catch me as I tumbled out of my chair, before my head hit the harsh steel of my file cabinet. I breathe slooowly like all the relaxed people do, and it goes away. Cool. But as I'm working I'm still thinking about it.

A few hours later it happens again, briefly, and I'm about ready to write my will. I go to stand up but as a side effect of nothing but my pure worry my legs feel heavy. Holy crap HEAVY LEGS I HAVE A BLOOD CLOT FOR SURE, AAAAHHHH. At this point the rational side of my brain (that is getting flailed on by the freak out side of my brain) says I need to go outside for a little bit and relax. And I do. I feel better!

On my way back inside I realize that my throat hurts, and this is more than likely all due to bad reflux I got last night after eating one of my food nemesis, hot dog. (I had coffee too, that doesn't help.) Damn you, hot dog and caffeine! I feel better when I can pin my not-so-strange symptoms on something. :)

So yeah, I'm a mega-weenie when I start to have strange health symptoms. I'm doomed!!! Luckily, my boyfriend knows this very well, and takes all my freak outs in stride. <3


Mr. Condescending said...

Like the classic 'I thought I swallowed a chicken bone wrong'. Us guys go through lol

the girl said...

Funny stuff. Every time I get sunburnt (I'm whiter than white, but luckily it only happens once every few years), I'm convinced all minor freckles have mutated into life-threatening melanomas. We are weird.


Moonjava said...

I have an award for you at my blog! :)

Asia Amor said...

I got sick so easily too, sorry with all the pains, do you get yourself checked up?

Sami said...

@MrC - I actually got a chicken bone stuck in my throat once! ACK!!!!!

@tg - we totally have melanomas!! aahhh the world is out to get us... :(

@mj - ty!!! you are the bomb!! <3

@aa - i would get checked out more often if i had health insurance! health costs are sooo expensive. i did have a really thorough check up with a lot of bloodwork last year though, and all came up great. :)