Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Why I am SO Not a Twilight Fan.
Okay, so this is sort of taboo. Everyone LURVES Twilight, amiright? Well, I don't. But I'm not going to be a giant ass about it, as not only do I understand that many people enjoy Twilight and are certainly allowed to, but I also enjoy things that other people may not like. (uhm, Warcraft anyone?) There's no reason to hate on people or things just because you don't like 'em! TOLERANCE, go team!! :)
Okay, now that my pep talk is out of the way. No, I don't like Twilight. Honestly though, I've only read the first book, but I was just so disinterested and unimpressed that I just didn't want to read anymore. Let me tell you why...
The LURVE Story
I like love stories as much as the next guy... uhm, gal. But this one seemed to advance WAY too fast. I mean, at the end of the first book, they were talking marriage already. Wait, whaaaat? Back that truck up! Now I know that doesn't happen until later on in the series, but I think marriage would be one of the LAST things on a highschoolers mind. It was very unrealistic for me to read! (Yeah, I know the vampires were also unrealistic, but they were supposed to be; the humans are still humans!)
I'm also of the love-at-first-sight-is-a-lie camp. The fact that Joanie and Chachi fell in lurve within a mere few school months left me a little uneasy.
Now, like I said, I like the lurve story. When it's done well. This seemed to be done far too rushed to seem realistic. I like it when love takes time to grow and blossom and all of that smarmy crapola, it's great to read and really makes the story and characters that more engaging. (Yes, they had a few awkward talks in the car, and at that restaurant, but ... I feel it's lacking!) It needs more than just half a book to break out the L word.
To me, from what I've read book-wise and cliff notes wise, this book just screams Mary Sue to me. Writers, you should know what that is, but for the rest a Mary Sue is pretty much an author self-insertion. Taken from Wikipedia, "...primarily functioning as wish-fulfillment fantasies for their authors or readers. ...single underlying feature of all characters described as "Mary Sues" is that they are too ostentatious for the audience's taste, or that the author seems to favor the character too highly."
Ok, here goes. Unpopular sort of mousy girl moves to dead-end town, immediately finds her the fancy of one of the most mysterious, charming, gorgeous boys in the school, oh wait let's not forget that other guy in her class that has a serious crush on her (Mike), the guy that hits her with her van and then asks her out for like forever (Tyler), OH, and the werewolf that develops a severe crush on her (Jacob), oh and wait, I forgot that other geek that talked to her on her first day of school and got all googoo over her (Eric)... and that's just the first book! Again, wait WHAAAAAT? It's a bit much. The main girl really doesn't need nearly every main guy fawning over her, does she?
But then again, what high school girl (or any girl, maybe?) wouldn't want a werewolf and a vampire fighting over her? And add some silly ol' humans in for fun? Now I know Steph wrote this book from a dream she'd had (chapter 13), but it seems like she may have had a boring old youth and is making up for lost time.
Now I REALLY may be the only girl in the world to think this, but I think movie Edward is well ........ yucky looking.
The Cure called, they want their bad hair, semi-stoner eyes, and sickly skin tone back.
Okay, those are my main three points of contention. Well, the first two really, I'm just getting tired of seeing three eeeeverywhere! And I understand that it's supposed to be written as a fantasy novel, but IMO there are just so many other fantasy novels that aren't as amateur and mindblowingly overpopular. Anyone else not a Twilight fan? Or are you a fan, and want to holler at me for defaming literary genius? *hack cough* :) In all seriousness, if you like Twilight, you should check out her book The Host. Amazing story, I loved that one!!
And I love y'all, no matter what you read! <3